The Sweet Spot

Here's another one from my file...

Do you ever have those moments? Those perfect moments where everything’s set up, just right? Where, even though perhaps you had a long night, you’ve got your day (or afternoon) set up to be the opposite? Let’s say, theoretically speaking, you and some friends drove a few hours to encourage a group of teenagers at a church camp and help lead a worship service. Let’s say you and said friends leave the camp after midnight, only to get a flat tire less than 10 minutes into driving down the mountain in the dead of night. Let’s continue the tale with arriving home at 3am in dire need of a shower and finally crawling into bed just before 4am only to toss and turn for the 4 hours until it’s time to get up and nurse your 3-month old son. This is all hypothetical, of course. You know can make it through, because you can take a 2-hour nap after nursing, and before driving to pick up your toddler, who got the pleasure of being spoiled for the night with her grandparents. But – and here’s where the gold comes in – when 1:30 hits, both kids go down for a looooong nap!! Amazing grace, how sweet the sound!!!

So, come what may, you set out to make it through the day. You choose to have a good attitude about the morning “nap” going by without much rest. You get through lunch and get both kids down, with amazing prowess, I might add. You bear through the first 15 minutes of crying as the 3-month old, adjusting to napping in the new crib, makes his protest known. You celebrate the wonderful self-control of your just-shy-of-two year old, as she stays in bed, enduring baby brother’s cries. Even subsequent cries from baby are tolerable to you, as you know you are about to get two hours of uninterrupted sleep – a precious commodity in this world of motherhood! You eat your lunch, keeping the lights dim so as to usher in the impending state of sweet sleep. You keep your mind free of the many thoughts that try to come in and command your focus. You finally make your way to your delicious bed, which has been beckoning ever since you parted with it this morning. As you lay your head on the soft pillow, you enter the perfect moment…the sweet spot! Hallelujah!!

But soft, what sound through yonder bedroom door breaks? Five minutes into your siesta, the unexpected happens. You try to ignore the sound that is penetrating your long-awaited dreamland. It’s not the sound of your infant’s cries, but your toddler’s! Turning on the monitor, yet still trying to deny what, in your heart you know is true, you see her in bed crying. Somehow, she’s picked up a cold overnight and is lying in bed runny nose and all…not sleeping. Not providing the peace and calm that she…or baby brother…or YOU need in order to get some rest around here!!! Whoa…was that me? So, you see…this was no sweet spot at all.

“Expect the unexpected.” This is what we’re studying at church right now. So it’s only fair that I give God some serious credit for being thoughtful and merciful enough on me, that He designed a whole series of sermons at this very time in my life where so much of the unexpected is experienced.

To me, the sweet spot in life is when things work out the way I plan them; or when people are really nice to me; or even when my kids do all of the things I want and stay on the schedule I design. Clearly, this type of relationship to things sets me up for lots of failure. One day, I’ll learn, tehe. Anyway, I let go of the plan, as it were. I got my daughter up out of bed, cleaned her sweet little face; and let go of the fact that she had clearly woken up the sleeping little baby who, even as I type, is fighting to try to get back to sleep. But that’s life, right?

I learned a phrase a few years ago. “There’s nothing wrong here.” It’s really a life-saving phrase if you can truly apply it. I’m still working on it, as you can see. But, choosing to let go of my plan today ended up opening doors for me that wouldn’t have been traversed if I’d instead chosen to lay in bed and be bitter…err… stay bitter. There’s nothing wrong here. It’s just different than I expected. I got to spend time comforting my sweet baby girl, who is just not feeling well. I got to pour my heart out (and my stress) by writing this down. And I got to move one step closer to the life that God has designed for me: to be willing to deny myself for the benefit of others.

In the Bible, Jesus says, “I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.” John 12:24-26

WOW! This is such cool stuff! Much bigger and longer-lasting than a great nap is having the kind of character I deeply desire to have. And I am learning that these are the moments in which that character is forged. I am the kernel of wheat. My desires and imagined sweet spots are the kernels of wheat. As I can learn and grow, allowing God to pluck those kernels and let them die, the seeds that are produced are service of others, placing the needs of others above my own and moments of truly expressed love- not just in word, but in action. These are the things I long to do, and to be known for doing. Yes, I may be going into the rest of my evening with less energy. But my daughter is loved. I have the satisfaction of knowing I chose someone else’s needs above my own. And…wait for it…my son is actually sleeping!!!

Wow, that was unexpected…